Glamour Shot Church

Glamour Shot Church

The most accurate picture of what I look like is on my driver’s license. I hate that picture.

On a couple of occasions I have needed professional headshots taken. I love those even though I don’t really look like how they make me look. It reminds me of the time when someone picked me up at the airport and said, “You look different from what I expected.” Silly man, he thought I actually looked like my glamour shot.

I think that one of the real, inner reasons we go to church is not to be impressive, but to be accepted. Yet, if I only show others my “glamour shot,” and I think they like it, then I will never really feel loved and accepted by them. I have a theory, unless God brings a radical healing to us we will forever be living out our junior high years. Over and over we will want the cool kids to invite us to lunch. We will want to be elected, made captain, or just not humiliated because we are smaller, bigger, smarter, dumber, taller or shorter than the others.

To begin to heal this brokeness we must summon our courage, face our fears and walk into church resolved to tell our truth. We don’t have to start with our darkest secrets. It is ok to “warm-up” a bit, practice sharing less severe or dramatic events. Here are some ideas that might help us get started:

1. Create a driver’s license picture church directory.
How fun would that be! Instead of nametags, just blow up your license, put a string on it, and, whamo, instant honesty.

2. Start an inside/out T-shirt collection
You don’t even have to say anything, just have a table full of T-shirts, and pick the one that feels appropriate that day. You’ll have instant conversation starter. Some ideas for the text on the T-shirts are:

I tinkle when I sneeze.
Maybe it wasn’t technically a business lunch.
I didn’t like the hair color God chose, that’s why!
I wear granny panties.
I pray before meals, but only when I think somebody is looking.
I cheat at golf.
I like it when people think I am humble.
I could stand to lose a few pounds.
The weight on my driver’s license is an “estimate.”
When I get pulled over by the police I act surprised.
I cheat just a little on my taxes.
My dog thinks I ‘m a shmuck.
I’m a little gassy.
I’m semi-evangelical.

3. Next time ask for prayer for a character defect instead of Aunt Martha’s bunion.
It is unusual to hear someone publicly ask for prayer for a moral ailment rather than a physical one. Even issues such as depression and anxiety, which are often beyond our immediate control, are seldom voiced as prayer requests.

Feel free to add to the list in the comment section below. Your quest for authenticity might look different from mine, but we want the same result: to say what we don’t like about ourselves, what shames us, what embarrasses us—and still be loved.

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This entry was posted in Christian Culture, healing, New Models and Paradigms, The Refuge, Thoughts on Scriptures. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Glamour Shot Church

  1. Steve Massey says:

    My quest for authenticity looks exactly like yours. I’m a one of a kind original, like everyone else. 😉
    Seriously, I love the picture you chose for this post; all of us really do want to be the most intresting person in the world. Some of us just want it more than others.
    This really is a heavy subject, and it probably requires more mental lifting than I’m capable of…but I’ll shoot from the hip.
    I think for many of us, we do one of two things; A), we either ignore that we’re broken altogether and go on with our lives like we always have, seeking to move further into the circle of cool kids, never questioning motive. Or 2), we realize we’re in need of healing and seek that healing from sources other than God.
    I’m not saying these other sources are fruitless–there are many worthwhile resources in this world for one to draw on–but I am saying that if we belong to the God of all creation, The Most High, the most powerful being that ever was and ever will be, then why don’t we turn to Him for help.
    Your theory, I believe, is right on the money; when God brings radical healing to us, we’ll be free to move on.
    I should try that, huh?

    Good stuff, Karl, thanks for sharing

  2. karlw says:

    i think your two choice conclusion is applicable to all of life, really. either fake and dont make it, or surrender and find the Life. “if any man…”
    thanks for your all you love and encouragement.

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